Any Given Moment
by ALC Punk!

There's still blood on his hands (on his cuffs and sleeves, and probably his face), drying into tackiness. Obstinately, he doesn't want to wash it off. If he does, he thinks he's letting go. Maybe admitting--he's not admitting anything.

Not while he still has hope.

"Captain?"

For a moment, he could swear the voice isn't real, that he's not staring into the next cell at the pale face of Sharon Valerii. Then reality informs him that the cruel trick of fate is indeed true. He's in jail with the woman--no, not woman. Thing. Robot. Cylon. The Cylon sleeper agent who just brutally murdered his father.

(Not murder. Attempted murder. Get the phraseology right or Hinchcliff is going to fail you on Colonial Law 101, Lee.) Shut up, Kara. She's not there to hear.

"Captain? I don't--what's..." And she stops. Perhaps she senses something, perhaps not. Her head tilts, her face turns away.

Lee stares at her in profile for a moment, feeling the gut-churning rage and anguish fill him until he can't help but demand, "Why did you do it, Boomer?"

The silence goes for so long that Lee thinks he can hear the flickering heartbeat of his father in the medical bay. Either that, or the steady metronome is the clock ticking away the seconds he has to live (Lee, you're such a dork. I swear, only you could spend this long on revision. C'mon, there's a game...).

"I didn't." She finally says, her voice breaking. "I didn't, I didn't, I--"

Lee wonders if he can break the bars with his hatred, stands so close that he knows there will be bruises later, and hisses at her, "You did. You destroyed a good man, you frakking Cylon."

The venom makes her twist to stare at him. She's been crying, streaks down her cheeks, and the bandage is incongruous. "I tried to stop them." The words are pitiful. "I tried so hard. I even..." Her hand drifts up, brushes over the bandage.

Boomer is shaking. And Lee wonders if this makes her more human or more Cylon. "Oh, I can see you did. Great job, Boomer."

(Is it easy to be a dick, or does that just come naturally, Adama?)

And Lee ignores Kara, as he has countless times before. This isn't about her (or him), this is about Boomer, and his father (and they haven't come to tell him how he is, so it could be all about his dead father). "You shot him. Why?"

"I don't know."

"You don't know?" Derision colors his tone, and he slams his shackled wrists against the bars, the sound loud as metal grates on metal. "That's frakkin' hilarious, Boomer. Next you'll tell me you're not really a Cylon, and that it wasn't you who shot him. Tell me, is the basestar really gone, or did you lie about that, too?"

"I don't know," she sounds stifled.

"Great. Just great."

"Racetrack."

"She's lucky you didn't kill her." The illogical conclusion prods at him, and he steps back, surprised. "But then, she wouldn't lie about the basestar being gone. Unlike you. Or is she a Cylon, too?"

"No! Only me. And me." Her voice breaks, and she laughs with a manic edge, the hysteria bubbling beneath the surface. "They told me they loved me, Apollo. How could I turn that down? How can I back away from something so human, so real..."

"My father. Shot. Dying." (not dead) His tone is harsh again. "Are you listening, Boomer? Your people have wiped humanity out. Have toyed with us and played us until we don't know which way is up."

"I'm listening."

(...can listen to those professors, I don't know, Adama. But you're a frakkin' geek.) "Shut up, Kara."

"Starbuck?" Boomer breaks from her hysteria, and she stares around. "She's not here, Captain. She's gone to Caprica, home. To fetch... To get..." But she can't seem to remember why Starbuck left the Galactica.

That's all right. Lee isn't entirely sure he understands it himself. Not that he's going to tell her that.

(Do they issue the stick up your ass once you become a senior cadet, or is it just something you do naturally, Adama?)

"She's not here." He says, firmly. She might be in his head, he might be remembering a hundred thousand conversations with her. But she isn't physically there to taunt him. He's sure his father will be amused at the concept of Kara Thrace being a pain in the ass over a long distance.

"I know."

"Know what?"

"She went to find the Arrow of Apollo." Boomer giggles, then freezes as if she can't quite understand how she made a sound so infectious. "Your arrow."

"Not mine."

"You're Apollo, aren't you?"

"Boomer--"

It's her turn to stand and move, and she touches the bars between them with an odd tentativeness. "This is my first time in the brig."

"Shut up."

"You're angry." Her head tilts, and her eyes study him, "Did you know you're covered in blood, Captain? New fashion statement?"

"Boomer--"

"I shot him," the words fall out abruptly, and her knuckles have gone white on the bars she's gripping. "I remember, it was so easy. I just pulled the trigger, the gun..."

(Pay attention, Lee, and you might learn something from being stuck in the brig.) It had always been her fault. "Where did the gun come from, Boomer?"

"Nowhere."

"You didn't have it when you got to CIC, did you?"

"No. They... You know the regulations, Apollo. No sidearms unless authorized, and we weren't authorized." She sounds odd, like something else is controlling how she moves, what she says.

Maybe this is Boomer.

"Where did the gun come from?"

"He shook my hand, and I pulled the trigger as he turned away..." Her eyes are wide, and Lee wonders why he sees a flash of blonde hair reflected in them, then it's gone. "Shook my--Gaeta."

"Gaeta?"

"Captain." Boomer stares at him, suddenly animated, full of something. Purpose, possibly.

(Everything has a purpose, Lee. Just because you don't think I do doesn't mean a frakking thing.)

"Captain, I may be a Cylon, but I am not the only one on the Galactica."

"You sound certain." He wonders when he got so tired.

"I am. Sir, you have to tell them, you--" She jerks, eyes widening, "It's too late. They're already... they love me. It's a wonderful thing, love..."

Lee stares at her, trying to comprehend, to understand. (You think too hard, Lee. Occam's Razor.) "Shut up, Kara." The words fall flat, though, and he watches with a detached horror as Boomer simply collapses. "Puppet's strings are cut," he whispers.

"Sir!" A marine bursts into the room, agitated.

"Hrm?"

"It's your father." The boy is practically bouncing, "He's going to make it. Dr. Cottle pulled him through!"

Lee remembers that he used to feel joy. He wonders if it was always this bittersweet.

-f-

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© 2005 ALC Punk!